And it feels just as warm as your touch.
They say that once you marry, you are meant for the person that you married and no one else. There is also an inside-out argument that you didn’t marry them because you were meant for them. You are meant for them because you married them.
There is nobody else. There is no other “right” person at that point. There might have been another person seconds before you said “I do,” but not after the wedding. Something happened in that fateful moment that you exchanged vows. You changed, the earth changed, and it’s irreversible.
If we are meant for someone in particular, who’s to say you’re wrong? This is the person God Himself designed for you.
I remember reading an article in which somebody wrote that if you’re single, there are probably hundreds of options out there. None of them soul mates, but all of them possibly potential soul mates.
So you don’t have to sift around looking for that one custom made, personalized grain of sand in the desert. You’ll be alone forever if you do that, and you don’t have to be alone forever. So all you need to do is reciprocate the love of anybody who gives you all of himself. That ‘anybody’ who gives you all of himself is most likely to be the perfect person for you.
My cousin and I didn’t meet till we were in our early twenties. And it was at a wedding in Mali. The wedding was out of town. After the wedding, during the whole three hour drive home in the bus, all I could do was think of how handsome he was. I didn’t get to see him again until three years later.
He contacted me to let me know that he would be moving to my city. I thought that would be a good idea so I encouraged him to stay with me for at least a few days when he moved to the city. I was a student in one of the country’s top universities and I lived in a cosy apartment off campus.
I was living alone and that made me feel very lonely sometimes. I didn’t even have a boyfriend at that particular time because I was tired of men breaking my heart all the time. So I was happy because my cousin was going to keep me company whenever he came.
Within the next two weeks my cousin moved to the city and came to stay with me in my off campus apartment. His place of work was not far from I lived, so he said it would be better if he stayed with me for some time and help me to pay my bills since he was employed and I was still a student.
I could not deny that there was chemistry between us from the moment he moved into my apartment.
I could see it in the way he looked at me seductively and how he seemed to dress to impress me. Even the way he complimented me on my good cooking showed that my cousin was in love with me. And whenever our bodies brushed past each other, sparks literarily flew and I felt turned on instantly.
Well after about a month together in my apartment, my cousin called me late one evening and said he had a long day at work and wanted a drink but didn’t want to drink alone.
I felt that it was cool for us to drink together, so I went over to him with a bottle of wine. I didn’t know wine made turned him on and made him bold enough to express his feelings.
After some glasses of wine, my cousin held me in his arms and told me how much he loved me. I didn’t resist him even though he was my cousin, because I felt the same way too.
After all, I was from Mali and according to Mali’s culture and tradition, we were permitted to marry, as long as we loved each other. In fact, several members of my family had also married their cousins.
My cousin told me that he wished to marry me because he had always loved me. All he wanted now was for me to love him back. “I love you so much, Aisha,” he said. “I can’t live without you. It’s because of you that I decided to come and work in the city. Please don’t reject my love.”
I told my cousin Usman that I also have feelings for him and would like my parents to give him my hand in marriage. On hearing me, he was so happy that he gave me a sweet kiss on the lips and squeezed me.
So I decided to slip out of the formal clothes I had worn to school and get comfortable in something in something more casual and sexy. Then I started watching TV.
Usman came to where I was sitting and watching TV and told me to sit on his lap. I sat on his lap and we started kissing again. Everything was so romantic and I couldn’t believe that this was actually me and my cousin.
But still, I had to speak my mind and I told him that I wanted a man who would save me from further heartbreaks. I really needed a man who was going to love me for the rest of his life and wasn’t going to break my heart like the rest. And Usman promised to be that man. “I swear that I will never break your heart. Aisha, from now on, I will save you from having any more heartbreaks,” he said.
It didn’t even feel wrong because we saw each other as husband and wife, even though we had not yet officially got married. We didn’t talk too much. We had sex for a significant part of the night.
My cousin eventually made good on his promise to seek my hand in marriage. My parents gladly agreed for us to marry each other and we wedded just a few months after our first night together.
I married my cousin because he was the one destined for me. I couldn’t have married any other man because no man ever made me happy like he did. All that other men ever did to me was break my heart.
Being married to my cousin is like heaven on earth. He saved me from having any more heartbreaks and makes me think I’m the most beautiful woman in the whole wide world. The experience is so sweet and I’m glad that me and my cousin were destined to be together.
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